Puckett Pregnancy
by smile4me-jade
Summary: Series of one shots that carry you through the craziness of a Puckett pregnancy. Can Freddie keep up?
1. Like a BandAid

I paced my bathroom, biting my nails.

_Oh gosh, oh gosh, oh gosh_ repeated through my head. Everything is going to change and I don't

know how I feel about it. I'm not mad, I think I might even be happy but right now all I am is

nervous. I eye the three sticks on the counter that all contain the same answer, just waiting for

some kind of sign that I misread them.

I hear the front door swing open and know my nerdy husband is home from work.

_You have to tell him, Puckett. Like a band-aid, fast. _I reminded myself.

I walk into the living room to see Freddie dropping his brief case and removing his shoes

while loosening his tie.

"Hey honey, how was your day?" He asks with a sincere smile.

"Uh, it was…interesting. I really need to tell you something."

"Go for it." He says simply and approaching me, wrapping me in a hug.

"Well, you know that empty room that you want to turn into a man-cave? You can't, it's going

to belong to someone else." He releases me looks at me confused.

"Sam, what do you-

"I'm pregnant." I rush the words out of my mouth and watch Freddie freeze in place, his eyes

with a spaced-out look of shock.

"Freddie, are you okay?" I ask waving my hand in front of his face hoping for a response.

He remains frozen for a few moments but he manages to say "S-so…you?...and I…w-with…like a

baby?"

"Yes." And with that he passes out.

"Freddie? Did you really just _faint_?" I ask poking his chest. Oh my gosh, I was already freaking

out and this was not needed, what I needed was bacon and a place to sit so I could figure out

the next step. I slap him across the face hard and he sits up straight, looking around desperately

confused yet again.

"Hey, do you understand what's happening now?" I hold his face in my hands and ask him

He slowly nods his head and says slowly "We're gonna have another abusive, carnivorous

monster running loose in the house." He looked almost scared.

I roll my eyes and slowly ask him the question I want the answer to most "Freddie…are you

happy?"

He looks at me thoughtfully for a few moments before his face softens and a small smile

spreads across his face. "I couldn't be happier."


	2. Don't Touch the FatCake

Freddie's POV

I'm sitting in the bright pink waiting room with tacky teal colored seats next to Sam and around us are other couples, even one of teenagers, smiling and holding hands. I'm so nervous. Sam has placed her hand on my frantically bouncing knee four times already. She seemed calm and maybe even a little excited. However, I was wreck.

Once I'd discovered Sam was pregnant, I did some research on pregnancy to know what I could expect and feel prepared being that she was only far enough along for me to know she pukes…like a lot. It only made it worse. There were so many things that could go wrong with Sam or the baby. I'd spent the whole week buying baby proof products, healthy foods for Sam, and hiding stuff that was less than healthy from Sam.

I was trying to come up with more creative hiding places for the endless supply of junk food that Sam kept when my thoughts were interrupted by a lady calling us to go see the doctor. I was frozen but Sam grabbed my hand and gave me an encouraging nod to follow her.

We walked down a bright hallway and into a small room where the doctor was standing patiently. She was a small woman with dark brown hair and freckles.

"Please take a seat, Mr. and Mrs. Benson." She said with a warm smile. Sam took the patient's seat and I sat on a chair against the wall, my knee bouncing yet again.

"Well, let me start by congratulating you on your new family member. Now I understand this is your first pregnancy so here are some things you should know."

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><p>Sam's POV<p>

After the appointment where Freddie fired question after question at the doctor we returned home. I walked to the pantry and was not surprised to find my FatCakes missing.

"Freddie! Where. Are. My. FatCakes." I understand that he just wants things to go smoothly but the guy is turning into his mother.

" We don't have any." He said innocently.

"Well of course we don't! YOU KEEP THROWING THEM ALL AWAY! Along with my bacon, soda, and candy!" now I was worked up. All I wanted was a food made of sugar to sit down with and watch some Girly Cow.

Freddie held up his hands as if to surrender. "Woah, calm down. No need to get crazy over FatCakes." By the look on his face that appeared right after he said that I could tell he knew he said the wrong thing. And he did.

I got so angry I was seeing red. I punched a hole in the nearest wall and ran out the door, slamming it so hard that anything hanging on the walls shook.

I was going to the grocery store.

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><p>Freddie's POV<p>

I stood there stunned.

Sam looked absolutely nuts just then. She hadn't thrown a fit like that since we were teenagers, especially over something as simple as a FatCake. And that's how I knew I had just received my first dose of psycho, hormonal Sam and I dreaded the moments in the coming months when it would happen again.


	3. My List

**Freddie's POV **

Here is a list of all the things I hate about pregnancy:

-Whenever Sam is throwing up, she wants me to hold her hair. I do it because it's what good husbands do but growing up with a mother who is super germaphobic and health conscious leaves it's mark so I see her vomit then I either get too grossed out and leave or vomit along with her. It happens everyday. It's a terrible process.

-Sam is not the emotional type but with all these hormones she can go from laughing about dish soap, to crying over mattress commercials, to punching me in the gut because I forgot to ask about her day (I now write a reminder to ask on my hand everyday so I don't get abused at home).

-If I thought my wife had a big appetite before…Grocery shopping now has to be done every other day.

-I could have said Sam couldn't get any lazier but then she got pregnant and proved me wrong. "Being pregnant" is her excuse to get out of everything. She once called me home from work with a "super-mega emergency" that was getting the remote from the other room. Whenever I tell her to do something herself all I hear is "The doctor says I need rest and nurturing and I'd hate for our kid to come out wrong 'cause I have a selfish husband that won't take care of me."I hate that excuse with a firey passion.

-I really wish random people would stop coming up and feeling Sam's belly because she isn't one to be touched and usually winds up decking them in the face.

-As this is my first child, I'm kinda nervous about being a dad and whenever I go out, I feel like every baby and child is watching me…

-I was scared enough about having a child until my friend joked about how funny it would be if we had twins being that having twins runs genetically. My wife has a twin…I just might pass out again.


	4. Fuzzy Photo

**Sam's POV (italics are her thoughts)**

Freddie's mom is such an overprotective nutbag. She was still pretty over-protective and calls Freddie constantly and drops in randomly when she wants to make sure he's "being provided with the proper resources to maintain a healthy life". Now that she knows I'm carrying a mini Benson, I get to be on the receiving end of her constant phone calls, health food lectures, and her daily speeches of safety in basically every aspect of a person's life.

She is a nurse and a mother so she does have some helpful advice about the baby but it also means she has an excuse to try to creep in on my doctor appointments. However, today she agreed to back off because we wanted our privacy for this particular appointment. Today we will get to see the baby for the first time.

I was overall pretty happy about having a kid but in moments like this where I was reminded about how real it is, I begin to syke myself out.

_What if my kid thinks of me no better than I do my mom? What if something bad happens to them because of something I did? Will I even be a good mother? Of course the kid will love Freddie because he never messes up anything but what about me? _This is what runs through my mind asI sit beside Freddie in the brightly colored waiting room.

I'm biting my nails when the nurse informs us we are next to see the doctor. We walk into the doctor's office, are asked a few questions, and eventually I'm laying on my back with my shirt rolled up as the doctor places a cold gel on my slightly bulging belly.

I feel myself holding my breath as the doctor moves a device across my small baby bump and staring intensely at the little screen where all I can see is a bunch of black and grey blobs.

The doctor smiles at me and points at the monitor, claiming a particular little blob on the screen is my child. _Seriously?_

I raise my head and squint, trying to see what she sees. I guess Freddie can see it because his grip on my hand tightens and hear him take in a sharp breath. The doctor sees my difficulty with the blurry image and points out the different parts of the baby. And then the image comes together and I see it. _That's my baby._ I feel stupid for not seeing it before but it's all I see now. There's a gentle rhythm coming from the monitor and doctor informs me it's the baby's heartbeat.

I'm completely lost with awe in the little image in front of me. I look to Freddie and see him already looking at me with a look that was filled with love, his hand still firmly grasping mine. And in this moment that I will remember for the rest of my life, everything feels completely perfect.

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><p><strong>Freddie's POV<strong>

The doctor informs us that she can't yet give a positive answer on the sex of the baby and that the monitor will be turned off in few moments but that she would print out the image for us. I stare at the screen again, watching the figure make slight movements.

There it is, my child. Sam's child. I can only see them in a blurry photo with no color but I still think it's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. In this instant I don't even care if the child eats a lot, screams a lot, is violent towards others, or is basically I smaller crazier and uncontrolled version of it's mother because this baby is mine too.

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><p><strong>I really love it when you guys review! *hint, hint*<strong>


	5. iHate Dresses

I'm watching an episode of Celebrities Underwater when I hear a screech of frustration from across the house.

I roll my eyes. "Sam! What did you do this time!" I shout back to her.

No reply. I peel myself off the couch and walk to the source of the scream. There I find Sam sitting in our closet with an ill fitting shirt on and tears on her face. Worried, I crouch down beside her.

"Hey, why are you upset?" I ask gently while wiping off her tears.

"None of my clothes fit me anymore." She says sadly and looks down at the protruding bump on her torso.

"We can buy you new clothes." I say, trying to comfort her.

Now she gets mad. "I don't want new clothes! I'll just have to buy more after that anyway because I get _fatter_ everyday!"

"You're not fat." I try to use a soothing voice because I've already dealt with psycho pregnant Sam three times this week.

"You're just saying that cause we're married! And now you're married to big _fat_ hippo." She spits the word "fat" venomously and she's back to crying but this time more loudly.

In retrospect I realize how dumb it was to say what I said next but I was desperate to calm her down before she got too upset so I stupidly said "But I like hippos!"

This earned me a punch to the ribs and Sam only cried louder and threw herself onto the bed.

Doubled over and trying to recover from the blow, I try again. "What I meant is that I understand that you're pregnant and that pregnant women gain weight. I'm fine with it. You're still beautiful, maybe even more so." I must have gotten it right this time because she mumbles through the pillow "Really?"

Score! "Yeah, now we have to go to Carly's for the barbecue soon so why don't you just wear a dress so you don't have to worry about the clothes being too tight?" I say while rubbing her back.

"But I hate dresses." She whines, still face down in the pillows.

"Please? It's just one day and then we can go clothes shopping."

Now she sits upright on the bed across from me and looks down pathetically at her hands. "I hate maternity clothes."

"It'll be okay. Besides, you and I both know you can make anything look sexy." I give her a big grin. She rolls her eyes and playfully tosses a pillow at me and we both laugh.

Sam and I leave our house hand in hand, her hair in gold ringlets down her back and wearing a light green dress that flows gracefully in the wind.

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><p><strong>If you like, please review and if you have already thank you :)<strong>


	6. iTell My Mom

**Sam's POV**

My relationship with my mother had always been strained until recent years. I was now on my way to her house to break the big news. My mother made Freddie uneasy because she was always so forward and blunt so he opted to miss this visit. I pulled into the old driveway of my former home, a run down, shoe-box like place.

I walk slowly up the walk and stand in front of the front door for a moment. I take a deep breath and reluctantly knock three times on the peeling paint of  
>the door. I wait anxiously for a minute until I hear footsteps from inside, the sound of slapping metal from the lock being turned and the loud creaking of the old door being swung open. There in the doorway stood my mother. She looked much the same but with more gray than blonde hair, not that you'd know because she constantly dyed it blonde. She started to wear clothes that covered her up a bit more but she did still dress like she was always going to a club.<p>

"Hey, kid! Long time no see." She said, looking genuinely happy to see me.

"Uh, hey, Mom." I said awkwardly as she gave me a quick hug and guided me inside where we sit at wooden kitchen table.

She caught the weird tone and a confused look masked her face. "Everything good?" She said, instantly investigating. "The hubby treats you nice? You keep up with the bills? Are you hiding from the cops again?"

"N-No, Mom. It's nothing like that." I stammer nervously. "Everything is amazing actually. I just have something really important to tell you."

"Sweet bacon, you're pregnant!" She yells instantly.

"No, that's not- wait, yeah. How'd you guess?"

"Oh please, Sammy! What else would you say?" She takes a moment with her head in her hands. "It finally happened. I'm a grandma." She says a little in disbelief.

I'm not sure how to carry the conversation from here so I just sit and watch my mother process the new information.

After about three minutes of silence my mother raises her head. "Just promise the kid won't will call me Grams. I'm not going to ask to be called It's aunt 'cause I'm not but I don't want to hear Grandmother, or MeMa, or even worse…Granny." She says with wide eyes and one hundred percent serious.

I just let out a soft laugh with a nod of my head. "Of course."

"Great." She says relieved. "So you and Freddie…"She raises her eyebrows and gives me a dramatic wink.

"No, Mom. We are not talking about that and you need to learn to control your curiosity if you are ever going to get him to stay in the same room as you for longer than fifteen minutes." I say firmly, but a small blush betrays me and I hope it isn't noticeable.

"So that's why he doesn't like me? You know, Sammy, it is not my fault. That boy's mother has shielded him too much. I bet he can't say the word 'boobs' without blushing."

"Oh please, Mom. You're exaggerating."

"Maybe, but I'm telling you to watch your kid around that nutjob who I'm sharing the grandma boat with because we Pucketts' do not have pansy children."

I know I probably should have defended Mrs. Benson and Freddie but I completely agreed. I wanted my kid to be tough and not easily crushed. "Don't worry, Mom. I'll watch out and you can help me."I say with a small smile.

"Good, I'd like that."

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><p><strong>Thoughts? Please review and thanks to those who have:)<strong>


	7. Baby Clothes

**Freddie's POV**

I'm digging around in the back of the storage closet looking for the sixth movie of my Galaxy Wars collection. After about fifteen minutes of rummaging through junk and hitting my head on the shelf I was ducking under about three times I'm about to give up when something interesting catches my eye. Instead of movie, I catch sight of a plastic shopping bag hidden behind boxes.

Curious as to what was in it that required hiding, I reach for the bag and what I saw inside was the last thing that I expected. Baby clothes.

I pull out various onesies designed for baby boys. Weird. Sam told me she didn't have a preference for the gender of the baby. I feel a smile creep on my face because I can tell by looking at them Sam bought them. They have comments and sayings like "Playground Pimp" and "All Mommy wanted was a back rub" and "Boob Man".

I laugh and shake my head as place the clothes back in their hiding spot.

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><p><strong>Short but I couldn't resist this putting in this bit. Thoughts? Feedback? Review:)<strong>


	8. Boundaries

**Freddie's POV**

We are sitting yet again in the doctor's office. We run through the usual check up questions and get to my favorite part, when the doctor shows the baby on the sonogram. She places the gel and glides the device across Sam's swollen belly.

We watch the monitor come to life and Sam and I watch the baby on the screen in awe.

"I can now tell you the sex of the baby." The doctor says happily. "Do you want to know or are you two planning on being surprised?"

Sam and I look at each other and I can see she wants to know just as badly as I do.

Sam looks away from me and to the doctor and nods her head excitedly. "We want to know now."

I'm holding my breath as the doctor focuses on the screen. She turns to me and Sam with a big smile on her face.

"It's a girl!"

Wow, a girl. I turn to Sam who I expected might be disappointed to not get a boy but find is stunned like me.

"A girl." She whispers and slowly a big grin spreads across her face and I feel one on me too. We both laugh and let it sink in.

I'm going to have a little girl. It feels so weird to think but so right at the same time. In that moment in my mind I see a little blonde girl with curls like her mother's and brown eyes the match mine. In my mind I can see her in my lap on the couch, watching Galaxy Wars with me and eating a plate of ham. Then I imagine the good grades she would bring home from school and calls we would receive from teachers because of the pranks she would pull. I can see Carly painting her nails in an attempt for girl bonding and her scratch off the nail polish when she thinks Carly isn't looking.

I continue to think of this little girl that would be a mixture of Sam and I and find myself more anxious than ever to meet her. I assume Sam is imagining what she'll be like too because she has a far away look in her eyes and a smile on her face.

After the appointment we get into our car and start the drive home.

"Oh my gosh, Freddie. This is happening fast."

"I know." I say with a smile.

"I really don't want to screw up this kid so we're going to have to establish some boundaries with your mom about what is okay around the baby. You know, like no hovering, letting her take some risk, allowing her to eat sugar filled junk. I don't want her running wild but I want her to have fun and and learn from mistakes, be independent." She says carefully. Not necessarily for the sake of not offending me but because she wants me to side with her and I do.

"Well that's fine but your mother needs to understand some boundaries too. She can't be around her while she is intoxicated, no exposing her to weirdo boyfriends we haven't met, and definitely no sex jokes." I wasn't the only one with a psycho mom.

Sam looks at me hard, tossing the rules around in her mind. "Deal" she says and we shake on it. "You know, Freddie, now you'll be outnumbered." She says cockily. "You'll be the only guy in the house. Two Sams against one Freddie." She smiles devilishly.

I'm again hit with the idea of another prank pulling, meat eating, abusive girl in the house.

"Oh boy."

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><p><strong>I wasn't as pleased with this chapter but here you go :**


	9. iWant a Burger

**Freddie's POV**

I'm in the office working on my computer to update old software.

"Freddie!" The end of my name drawn out and the voice comes from the living room.

"What?" I yell back and pause for an answer but hear nothing. "What?" I yell again but of course she won't answer because she likes to be difficult. With a sigh I drop my work and wander to the living room where my pregnant wife is pouting on the sofa.

"Sam, what's up?" I ask as I sit next to her.

"Well, I was watching t.v then the commercials came on." She says angrily.

"You know the commercials will end."

"Yes, but one of the commercials was for Inside-Out-Burger."

"Which means…

"Holy Chizz, Freddie! Do I have to spell it out for you? I. Want. A. Burger!"

"Okay, fine!" I say with both hands raised in surrender. "Can you say please?" I say with an expectant look on my face.

"I don't know, Freddie. Can you say 'I'm sleeping on the porch if I don't buy Sam a burger!'?" Yesterday she sent me to get star fruit and the day before that she wanted pickles with peanut butter. I didn't know if I could blame these tantrums and outburst for food on the baby because this seemed to fit regular Sam pretty well.

I drove across town to get the stupid burger. I walk into my house with the greasy meal at my side and find Sam asleep on the couch.

"Of course." I mumble to myself and toss the fast food bag on the counter.

I didn't want to wake Sam because sleep didn't come easily for her anymore now that she had to toss and turn to find a comfortable way of sleep. I placed a fuzzy blue blanket over her. She looked peaceful. The muscles in her face loosened and her golden locks splayed around her face. Her arms rested over the big bump on her belly. It was a nice moment so I took a picture and left to make copies in case she attempted to destroy the image of her looking sweet and vulnerable.


	10. Baby Shower

There was no stopping Carly from throwing this baby shower. I whined and protested but she insisted. Spencer's apartment is covered in pink and green and purple. Balloons are tethered in various parts of the living room, streamers hang from the walls, and little pink diapers and bottles and pacifiers are printed on tablecloths. A big sign hangs over the gift table that reads "It's a Girl". Carly doesn't do anything half way.

I sigh and plop onto the sofa. Carly skips in happily carrying a big cake shaped like a flower, the best part of this whole event.

"Sam, smile. The party starts soon." I give her a big dramatic smile.

As if on cue, there's a knock at the door. Carly squeals and jumps in excitement. She takes a second to compose herself then opens the door with a welcoming smile.

"Hey, Melanie, David. Welcome to Sam's baby shower." My twin sister walks in with her fiancé on her arm.

"Oh my gosh! Sam, you're so big. I'm so happy to see you!" She grabs me in a tight hug that squeezes the air out of my lungs.

"Yeah, I know, the kid makes me gain weight. I'm glad you could make it."

More people continue to file in, one of them being my mom.

"Woah, Sammy. Are you sure you're having a kid and didn't eat one for breakfast?" Yay, my own supplier of fat jokes for the next three hours.

Then when Mrs. Benson arrived she asked questions about my doctor visits, diet, and about every other aspect of my life.

Once everyone had arrived, Carly began the games she had planned. For one of them, all the men had to line up, including Freddie, for a baby food tasting contest that Gibby won. The guy managed to guess every flavor right, of course Gibby _would_ know the taste of all the baby food. Another game involved everyone cutting pieces of yarn to the length they thought could wrap around my torso perfectly. That inspired more weight comments from my mother. And a baby word scramble game.

Eventually it was time for presents. I open numerous baby dresses and shoes, bibs, and toys, all themed with flowers or butterflies and very girly colors. I also got things I needed like bottles, diapers, and other baby care products. I also received a bottle of stretch mark cream from my mom. When I open that gift I give her a "seriously?" look and she replies with "Sammy, I _wish_ someone had got me that when I was pregnant. You'll thank me later." And she shrugs.

When I reach the end of the gifts Freddie tells me he and Spencer saved me a surprise. I wait in my chair and watch Freddie roll out something bulky that is covered by a sheet.

Freddie and Spencer stand beside it. "Sam," says Spencer, "we give you the best baby present ever." And with that the sheet is yanked off revealing a bassinet.

Its lime green bordered with pink. At first glance it's an ordinary bassinet but upon closer inspection I found that the inside was lined with a Galaxy Wars themed fabric and the three toys that hung from the shade showed the first to be shaped like a ham, the second was the iCarly icon, and the third was shaped to be a mini model of a camera. The blanket placed inside bore the same image as the picture I had framed on my nightstand which was a picture of Carly, Spencer, Freddie, and I that was taken when we shot our last episode of iCarly. Sure the combination of all the personalized objects didn't match very well but in my eyes it was beautiful.

"Now the baby can sleep surrounded by everything we love." Freddie says and puts his arm around me.

"I love it." Is all I can manage to say because these stupid hormones are getting me all emotional.

A few of my guests let out the sound of "Aww" which kinda bugs me so I pull myself together and say "Alright Carls, is it cake time."

My mom says "Hey Sam, are you sure you can even fit-

"Don't ruin my cake time." I say giving her a sharp look before we both laugh.

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><p><strong>I love hearing your thoughts so review if you want more<strong>


	11. Sweet Talking

My feet hurt. My back hurts. Oh, and what do you know, I have to pee again.

I'm stuck all alone at home watching daytime television. Jealous? Didn't think so.

"I want a glass of wine!" I say to the empty house. _Maybe just one glass won't…_Then I remember Freddie got rid of anything I could possibly want to eat and left the house full of vegetables and whole wheat junk.

I stand in front of my pantry just waiting for something yummy to catch me eye but nothing does. But wait! I remember about a bag of Fladoodles I hid in the storage closet when Freddie's mom decided to organize our pantry. I knew she'd throw them away if she found it so like everything else I want hidden, I threw them in the closet. Then again, that was some months ago and they could be expired…like I care.

After rummaging through the closet for five minutes, I find the bag of cheesy goodness and do a small victory dance. I rip open the bag and the cheddar scent bursts into the air…causing me to be hit with a wave of nausea. I throw the bag on the floor

"Ugh!" I plop down on the couch again. This kid doesn't let me eat anything I want.

"Feel free to come on out sometime soon." I say to my little meal ruiner. Then I think of how she will be coming out sometime soon, in just a few weeks actually.

"You're going to love it here." I continue to talk to her. "Your daddy is so excited to see you. Your dad is kinda- well, _really_ nerdy but you'll learn to love him." It's a little weird talking to someone that hasn't been born yet but this feels good and I'm going to have to talk to her for the rest of my life, why not practice.

"You're going to love your aunt Carly just like I do. If you happen to be all girly you can always go to her for shopping trips or manicures and make up tips. I think you'll be more like me though. I want to show you how to make the Sam Supreme sandwich and give a good Texas Wedgie."

"And I hate to break it to you but both of your grandmothers are insane. One will probably strap a helmet and shin pads to you as soon as I pop you out and the other might offer you a beer before the age of five."

I'm quiet in thought for moment because what I want to say next is important and I want to say it right whether she can hear me or not.

"I want you to know that you have to be patient with me. I've never been a mom before and responsible isn't exactly one of the words that comes to mind when you think of me. I'm going to try really hard to be a good mom. I can't really cook, homework makes me frustrated, and cleaning is something I make your dad do but I promise that I'll get better because even though we haven't met, I already love you so much."

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><p><strong>Ahh, so I think the last chapter is next or close to it...REVIEW!<strong>


	12. Agree

**Freddie's POV**

My mom is so overbearing. As of right now she has Sam and I sitting in her living room to discuss "_the_ _challenges pregnancy brings to couples"_.

"Now Sam, are there any issues you wish to talk to Freddie about that you didn't have before your pregnancy?"

"I didn't have to sit through unofficial therapy sessions." Sam mumbles too low for my mother to hear.

"Mom, we don't have any problems." I tell her.

"Well ok then. How about sleep? Sam do you have sleeping problems?"

"I sleep like a baby." Sam says looking bored out of her mind.

I think back to just the middle of last night when Sam punched her pillow numerous times before squirming under the blankets to find comfort. "_Damn pillow."_ I heard her grumble before falling back to sleep.

"Well, what about eating? I'm sure your diet has changed since the baby."

"I've adjusted, healthier foods ain't so bad." She rolls her eyes.

I remember arguing with Sam because I forgot to pick up FatCakes when I went grocery shopping. "_You didn't get them on purpose!"_ She screamed at me, her eyes tearing up. _"You didn't get them because you think I'm getting fat!"_

"_That's not true!"_ I tried to defend myself.

"_Of course it is because you remembered to buy the fricking carrots!"_

"How about intimacy? A baby can take alone time away from parents." My mother continues to pry.

"We are good in that category too, Mrs. Benson." Sam says through clenched teeth.

However I have a flashback of last week when I came home from work and found Sam preparing food in the kitchen. I crept up behind her and wrapped my arms around her and kissed her cheek. She simply responded with a "_Hands to yourself, Benson."_ And sat at the couch with her food to watch t.v.

"Any mood swings?" My mother went on.

"Nothing crazier than before." Sam says.

I replay in my mind when she was sobbing during a movie, something she never does, so I hugged her, which she allowed for about five minutes before punching me in the gut because she wasn't "_some sissy chick that needs someone else's sympathy"._

It went on this way for about twenty minutes. My mom would ask an invading question, Sam would brush it off.

When my mom was drained of questions she said, "Freddie? What about you? You didn't say anything the whole time."

"Oh, it's nothing. I just agree with Sam."

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><p><strong>The idea for this chapter came from me not being able to sleep so with a little insomnia I whipped this up for you guys :) Review if you like.<strong>


	13. Names

Sam and I are walking home from a nice restaurant where Sam sassed, glared, and left a crappy tip for our waitress.

"Hey," I look at here questioningly, "why were you peeved with the waitress?"

Sam rolls her eyes, "Her name was Lindsey." She says like it's the most obvious reason in the world.

"What's wrong with that name 'Lindsey'?"

"I knew a girl in the third grade who tattled on me for pouring glue in the drawers and her name was Lindsey." A scowl sits on her face and pulling her red jacket closer to her.

"So all girls named Lindsey are bad?" I say disbelieving of her logic.

"No," she says, "her name just reminded me and it made me mad. I'm not saying _all_ people with the name Lindsey are bad, just that I probably won't like them." She states simply.

I shake my head slowly side to side, "Hating someone because of a name?" I say more to myself than to Sam.

"Well, names are important." She defends.

Then I'm reminded, "You know, _we_ still have to pick a name."

"Well, let's start right now." A smile of excitement is evident on her face.

"Oh! I've got it!" I say with mock excitement, "We can name her Lindsey!"

"Real funny, Benson." She bumps me of the sidewalk but I see her playful smirk.

"For real now, how about Sophie?"

"That's too girly." She replies with distaste, "How about Dawn?"

"Eh, I don't see it. I really like the name Janette." I say hopefully.

"Ew!"

I sigh, "How about Miranda?"

"No, that's not right either. What about a name that's unisex, like Bobby, Charlie, or Alex?"

"No, I want the name to be feminine…like the name Janette."

"I don't like it!"

"Please!"

"No."

"What's wrong with it?"

"It's too long and it sounds delicate, you can't run in fear from a name like that."

"Well, then we can shorten it. How about Jane?"

"Freddie, that is so stu-wait…Jane…Jane." She plays with it in her mind and a small smile is visible. "I kinda like it. It's simple, solid, easy to say."

I grin widely, "So it's settled?"

"Yes." She smiles back.

"Jane Carly Benson…I love it."

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><p><strong>Kept it short and sweet. I hope I didn't offend anyone with the comments on the names, I wrote how I thought the characters would react to them, they are not my personal thoughts.<strong>


	14. Jane

**Freddie's POV**

I'm flipping pancakes just waiting for the scent to wake up Sam. She sleeps like a rock, there could be an earthquake and she would still be sleeping but if breakfast was in the air…

Just as I expected, a tired Sam waddled into the kitchen.

"Pancakes?" She asks hopefully and half asleep.

A sleepy smile spreads across her face. "Awesome. I'm going to brush my teeth real quick, my breath is killing _me_." She walks out of the kitchen to find the bathroom.

I'm sliding the last of the fresh pancakes onto a big plate when I hear a yelp from the other side of the house, where the bathroom is.

I drop the pancakes and run to the bathroom where I find the door shut and locked. "Sam?" I yell through the door. "Are you okay?"

"Freddie, I think the baby is coming!" She says in a shaky voice.

"Like _now?"_ I croak.

"No, next Tuesday, I just felt like warning you- what the hell? Yes, _now!"_

'_Okay, Okay, I've got this, it'll be great' _I say to myself pacing hallway. Sam opens the bathroom door and I see her pants are wet. '_Gross' _is the last thing that runs through my mind when I pass out.

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><p>I'd seen women go into labor in movies but it was definitely a different experience to be there in person. We are currently in a green hospital room and Sam lies in the hospital bed with me at her side and holding her hand.<p>

The doctor confirms that Sam _is_ having the baby but it isn't time to, well, push.

"Wow, this happening." Sam says with a smile but her eyes show she's scared.

"Everything will go fine and then we can take home our new baby girl and start our life as a family." My finger traces circles on her hand to soothe her.

She smiles real big. "That sounds so-

Her sentence is cut short by a contraction that makes her scream and her hand crushes my fingers in hers causing me to scream as well. The two of are screaming for about thirty seconds when she releases my hand and slumps back against the pillows.

I'm tending to my mangled fingers when an irritated Sam barks at the nurse, "When are you going to do your job and get this kid out!"

The nurse however remains unphased by Sam's harsh tone and replies, "We are nearing the time for the delivery. Just try to relax."

"Don't tell me what to do!" Sam screams.

"Calm down, Sam. It's going to be great." I try with less confidence to calm her down.

"Shut up, Fredwart! You don't have a tiny person trying to squeeze through your-

She gets another contraction and is back to screaming.

"Okay," The nurse addresses me, "your wife's contractions are close enough together. I will find the doctor." And she leaves me alone with a livid, screaming Sam.

"Okay Sam. It's showtime." I take her hand and push her hair behind her ear.

"No! I changed my mind, I'm not ready to do this." She whimpers.

I look her in the eyes and say with confidence "Sam, you can do this."

* * *

><p>There is yelling. Lots of yelling.<p>

Sam is squeezing my hand so hard I fear it's broken. The doctor commands Sam to push while the nurse instructs her breathing and Sam yells profanities and names at me that I've never even heard before. She even mustered up the time to punch me in the arm twice.

"Mr. Benson, the baby is almost here if you'd like to see."

"Uh, I really don't-

"Freddie, look at the baby!" Sam screeches.

"No, it's gross, I'm scared." I might pass out again.

Sam gives me a blow to the stomach and a fierce growl.

Reluctantly and slightly hunched over from the punch to the gut, I hobble over to the doctor's side but keep my eyes pinched shut.

And then there is a cry. I tiny cry. It seems to cut the noise of the loud, busy hospital room. That's Jane crying and she's all I hear.

My eyelids slide open and out of the corner of my eye I see the small form of the baby being held by the doctor but I can't look closely because the nurse is shoving scissors into my hands to cut the baby's umbilical cord.

"Erg, I really don't think-

"For goodness sake, Fredbut, just do it!" Sam yells.

I rush through my job with scissors trying to keep from passing out. The baby wails from her place at the sink with nurse.

I look to Sam and she's laid back on the hospital bed looking exhausted with strands of hair stuck to her head with sweat. I turn back to the nurse who is about to wrap the baby in a blanket. I actually _look_ at my baby laying on the counter…and scream.

Sam snaps up, suddenly alert. "What wrong?"

"I-It's the…she…there's-

"Spit it out!"

"Our daughter has a penis!"

"What!"

The doctor looks at us confused. "I don't think you two understand. You didn't give birth to a girl. You have a healthy baby boy."

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><p><strong>Well this was fun to write. Let me know your thoughts :)<strong>


	15. I Guess We Were Wrong

**Sam's POV**

I hold the little pink person wrapped in a blue blanket close to my chest from where I sit on the small hospital bed. Strands of my hair fall forward and tickle his face, making him scrunch up his small features. I can't help but to just stare at him in wonder and pure adoration.

_Jake. Not Jane._

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><p><strong>Okay, so I don't have much time on my hands right now but I felt bad about not updating because I usually do it often but here is a taste of the next chap which <strong>_**will**_** take place in the hospital.**


	16. Two Men

**I had planned for this chapter to take place in the hospital but after I wrote it, it didn't seem right so instead this chapter is just a little piece of what their lives are like with the baby around. This is the last chapter being that she is no longer pregnant.**

* * *

><p><strong>Freddie's POV<strong>

I wake up at the 3:00 a.m to the baby monitor emitting the cries Jake.

"Your turn." Sam mumbles.

"No, I got him last time." I grumble back.

"Well it's your turn because I said so." And with that she rips the blankets off me and faces the opposite way signaling that she will not be getting up.

I sleepily fumble to Jake's room which is sadly very feminine. The walls are a light baby green with white flower wall art, white furniture, pink lamps and blankets and chair. Poor kid.

I grow nearer to the cries until I'm standing over the crib and as soon as he sees me his cries quiet down.

"It's okay, buddy." I hold him and tiredly bounce him around in a circle.

Five minutes pass and he's still fussing and I'm so tired I might fall over if I keep standing so I sit with him in the stupid girly rocking chair and let the soothing back and forth motion lull him to sleep.

* * *

><p>I must have fallen asleep in the rocking chair with Jake because that's exactly where I awake with a squirming baby in my arms. I start to bounce him again to calm him when I notice the red lipstick lips on his forehead. Sam.<p>

"I guess Mommy said good-bye to you before she went to work." I say as leave the rocking chair and walk the baby to the changing table.

I set down Jake and the mirror on the wall above his changing table reveals red lipstick lips on my cheek. "Looks like Mommy said good-bye to me too." I say with a small smile.

Now I realize Jake _is_ indeed a boy but we are behind on laundry and he doesn't have a ton of boy clothes in the first place. However, there is a nine month build up of little girl clothes in his closet.

I know Sam hates that he has girly things and refuses to put him in the clothes but once he's wearing girl clothes he looks like a girl. Sam doesn't need to know that this is my solution or how often it happens. He's a baby, nobody is going to notice the difference unless they know us.

* * *

><p>Jake and I arrive back at the house from a walk and due to lack of anything else to wear he's in a pink sundress and headband.<p>

With the stroller parked in the garage, I carry Jake to the kitchen where I find his mother standing. She looked like she was about to say something when she realized what Jake was wearing. Then her face shifted to one of annoyance.

"Dammit, Freddie! I told you not to put him in those clothes!" She marches up to me and takes the baby and yanks the headband off of his head.

"Well, _somebody_ didn't do the laundry and this was all that was left. Nobody even knew he was a boy, Sam. And look at him, he looks pretty happy to me." I motioned at Jake who gurgled baby noises with a goofy smile on his face while his mother tried to unbutton the dress.

He's now in his diaper, sitting on Sam's hip and tugging at her blonde curls while she glares at me. I try to glare back but she looks pretty scary and it falters. Then her face softens.

"Just stop dressing him up like a girl. There is no more Jane Carly, we have Jake Spencer Benson and he _is_ a boy."

"Ok, got it. I wasn't expecting you to be here though. Why aren't you at work?"

"I took off the rest of the day to spend it with my two men but I got a dopey hubby and a baby girl." She smiles.

"Well let's not waste the day." I wrap my arms around the both of them and place a kiss on Sam's forehead.

The rest of the day was spent on the couch joking, watching t.v, and playing around with Jake and his toys.

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><p><strong>Special thanks to <strong>annbeth chase's BFF andFav sis **for inspiring Jake's name :)**


	17. Chapter 17

**This is not a chapter, just a thank you to those who read and especially to those who commented because it encouraged so many chapters. If there were any ideas are other places I could take the characters on a separate story, I'm open to suggestions but other than that…The End :)**


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